Pandoras Box’s blog

QotD: Looking Ahead...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 06:42:05 -0800

What are you most excited about in 2010?

There are several things I am excited about in the coming year.

I am most excited about traveling. I have a trip to Costa Rica planned with my best friend (and possibly my kids, not sure yet) and a family trip to Florida planned.I love traveling and depending on how much I get back from my settlement for my car accident I might do more than just those two trip this year.

I am also excited about the fact that I found a special job training program for my son who has Aspergers Syndrome. He will go spend a couple weeks away this summer and he will be paid for the training. It gives me hope that he won't be stuck in some menial retail job his whole life. He is honor roll in school so he has no intellectual problems, his problems are all in how he relates to other people.

Also exciting is that fact that my son will be driving soon. He was old enough to drive a year ago, but I never got the money together for him to take the classes, but soon I will have the money so soon he will be driving. One more step toward being a normal teenager.

I am excited about the fact that I plan to get my website back up and running. I took it down about seven years ago. The one I am putting back up is about a third the size of my old one, but I figure you have to start somewhere.

I think this is the last one. I am excited that I am finally going to get my basement remodeled so the master bedroom will finally be able to be moved into. Right now it is just framed in and has no walls, same with the family room down stairs. Finally my house will be complete....hmmm...now if I could do something about my dinky kitchen.

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Christmas...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 07:59:30 -0800

I love Christmas time. I have almost all my shopping done. I need to get one more present for my daughter and all the stocking stuff for the kids. Yay...

This Christmas has been good because I am not as broke as I usually am, so I don't have to decide between food and presents.

I made Christmas cookies and candy. I just have to get it mailed out. I was planning to do that today but don't think I am going to get around to it. I am hoping they will get there by Christmas, but I am starting to cut it pretty close.

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Zen...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 10:46:23 -0700

I want happiness, true happiness, not the fleeting variety that so often surfaces.I want to feel it at the random moments throughout the day, whether it be sitting out on the porch or doing the dishes.I want to feel complete happiness and peace at that moment. Like when doing dishes. I want the zen feeling of the water running over my hands and to notice the smell of the soap. It is so hard to stay present at every random moment, but whenever I do it I feel complete happiness, peace and creativity.It is a feeling that makes you feel warm inside and out and gets rid of any deeper longing at least for that momemt. For a moment it makes everything seem crystal clear. I need to know how to capture that moment and string it out over my entire day and then I will have found the meaning of happiness.

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QotD: Run Away

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 08:46:21 -0700

Did you ever run away from home?

I used to run away from home a lot when I was younger, but I never really made it very far. Usually I would hide out somewhere like the attic of the garage or somewhere still at home, but hidden, so that doesn't really count. By the time I got to high school I would run away and stay at a friends house or one time I stayed at a park and my brother brought me food. I was never gone for more then a couple of days though, mostly I just needed a break and had to get away. I admit I had some mystical thinking about being "out on my own" and someone somewhere was going to discover me and I would be a famous model or something.lol

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You know who you are...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 11:03:55 -0700

This is what I would really like to say to you...

I realize that you were bored today. It was boring, but part of being a parent is having to suck it up at those times that you're bored but the kids are having fun. You are mainly just there to watch the kids enjoy themselves. Your constant whining just really sucks and it makes me seriously rethink our relationship. It is like Christmas morning. The kids wake up early and are excited. As a parent you are not excited to be up at that time of day, but you suck it up for your kids. Why because the day is for them...like today. The fair is for them to have fun, they only get it once a year. Your purpose is pretty much to stand there and hold their stuff while they go on the rides and have fun. I don't understand why you can't put yourself second for once....I could probably go on but I would just be repeating the same thing so I will stop now, but i definitely won't be inviting you anywhere again..

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Apathy takes over...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 14:47:35 -0700

I don't know what my problem is these days. I am living in a state of apathy. I haven't been in the mood to do anything at all. I haven't been taking pictures, writing, or really even cooking. I don't understand what is making me like this. My life right now is better then it has been in years. I am not stressed out all the time, but I just feel so blah. If I could, I would just lay in bed reading all day. Work isn't any better. I go there and the second I clock in I start counting down the hours until I can leave, and I am only putting in a half-assed effort. In the morning when it is time to go I have to force myself to get up and go because I just don't want to schulp away another day, but it isn't like I would be doing someting productive if I stayed at home. I just don't know how to pull myself out of this, since I don't know what is making me like this.

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QotD: Opposites Attract???

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 16:14:40 -0700

I have not been around to post lately but I am working on changing that, but for now it is a question of the day...

Are you more attracted to people whose personalities are similar or different to yours?

It actually depends on being attracted to them for what. As far as friends I tend to be attracted to people who are like me. I have really high energy and I am a definite extrovert and and tend to befriend people who are the same...but...

As far as being in a relationship with someone I am attracted to my opposite. I like guys who are laid back and low energy. Mainly I think because I would be exhausted if I spent all my time with someone who was always as hyper as me.

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Laina at the stream...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 16:02:53 -0700

Picture 066

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Random photos...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 16:00:22 -0700

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Long overdue update...

nobody@vox.com(Pandoras Box) — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 14:44:19 -0700

Update 1...I haven't been posting much because I have been stressed out over my house , but I just got the call back from my mortgage company yesterday. They are going to modify my mortgage and lower my payments. My payments got cut in half and they are forgiving the missed payments so I don't even have to make them up. My house has been saved.This has actually been my main stress for the last year so I am glad it has been resolved.

Update 2...I am seeing someone. This is huge progress for me, as for the last two and a half years I have been avoiding all guys like the plauge. Although I admit when he asked me out I was screaming to myself in my head not to do it, but I took the leap and did it anyway and so far it has been worth it. Although it has only been a month, so it is to soon to tell.

Update 3...My kids are gone for a month, my mother came and picked them up and took them back to Montana to visit for a while. The most amazing part is that my ex-husband actually visited them, not once, but several times. I was shocked but pleased

Update 4... I have been waiting around for a disability check from when I was out of work a couple years ago and it finally came through I got two thousad dollars.

I think that is it...

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